Use This Game-Changing Phrase

When you’ve worked in hospitality for a long time you naturally become expert at putting others first. Of course, the guests & team come first, then your boss and sometimes even your colleagues come before you do. Putting others first is part of hospitality and putting your needs to the side - for a service or for a moment - becomes second nature. It’s just what we do as hospitality pros.

Putting others first is part of leadership. But I always remind my clients that they come first. Before their team, before the fire that needs to be put out, before the guest who is unhappy, you come first. In a post (You’re #1), I advised on how to put yourself first at work so you can take up more space and embody your leadership role effectively. But something else I advise is to state what is important to you when speaking to your team. Ownership is key to letting people know you’re in charge and that what you think and feel goes.

The phrase I rely on to do just this is:

“It’s important to me…”

This phrase is a game changer when setting an expectation or delegating to a team member. “It’s important to me” puts you in the driver’s seat and ensures your vision and expectation are front and center. By owning the importance to you, you are shedding light on how you think and what you care most about. But it doesn’t just end there. Add the “because” and share why it is important. There’s so many ways a task could be impactful, share why it is in this specific instance.

Here’s an example. Say you want your assistant manager to update the opening checklist procedures. There are two reasons: first, you want them to articulate what is actually necessary to open up the shop and, second, you also might want to help your team member learn something new and flex a new management muscle. So you could say “hey Jay, I want you to update the opening checklist.” But that isn’t very compelling. Adding the magic phrase and filling in the importance can transform this simple request into something much more meaningful. “Hey Jay, it’s important to me that the opening checklists reflect what we’re doing daily, so I want you to update it.” or “Jay, it’s important to me that you update the opening checklists because you have a great handle on the morming setup. And I’d like to see how you express this task.” So much more personal and persuasive than the request alone.

Some leaders, when I share this phrase, worry that putting themselves first might look like they are egotistical. And I can understand that misconception and discomfort. So trust me when I say it’s not about ego, it’s about ensuring that you are being understood and that your vision for the business is being upheld. Remember, as an agent of the business what you find important is truly important! That’s why you’re in charge; you were hired for your judgement and ability to motivate a team. So use “It’s important to me” whenever you need to rally your team, express your expectations, and guide your reports to the next level. It’s not about ego, it’s about empowering others to do more and grow in their own role by learning what’s important…from you.